


but there really is no option

by pumpkinisland



Category: A New Brain - Finn/Lapine
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-29
Updated: 2018-08-29
Packaged: 2019-07-04 05:19:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15834528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pumpkinisland/pseuds/pumpkinisland
Summary: Gordon spends a few moments with Roger and anxiously thinks about his decision to do the surgery.





	but there really is no option

A high risk operation, something he _couldn’t _turn down even if the list of side effects made him uneasy. He could DIE, leaving behind any chance he had for a big, spectacular Broadway debut. The only recognition he would get for his work would be a few lines on a Wikipedia page for a children's show about a talking frog man. He wanted to refuse and tell Dr. Berensteiner to fuck off and let him get back to the songs he had to write, but the look in Roger’s eyes made him falter.__

__

__Roger, the love of his life, who had stayed up countless nights listening to Gordon rant and scream and breakdown about how he hated his job and his boss, had never been really good at expressing his own emotions. Gordon used to have to coax his feelings out of him after Roger shut down because of whatever stress he kept bottled up, but after years of experience he was able to tell what Roger was feeling with just a glance._ _

____

____

Roger believes in Dr. Berensteiner, he believes that Gordon could get better and the hope in Roger’s eyes was enough for him. He agreed to the operation and smiled politely as he was told he was making the right choice. Soon after, everyone but Roger was ushered out of his room, leaving him alone with Gordon and his thoughts. 

“Roger,” Gordon asked, looking at their intertwined hands to avoid eye contact, “am I doing the right thing?” He almost cringed at how small and weak his voice sounded, and at how easily he was letting this get to him.

“Of course you are,” he said, in his stupid comforting _everything will be alright _voice “you’re strong Gordo, a little surgery isn’t going to stop the asshole boyfriend I know and love.You’ll go right back to being a pain in my ass in no time.”__

____

____

“You’re such a dick you know that,” Gordon half heartedly pushed him away. “And I know what you’re doing, you’re not going to get me to cry you homophobic jerkface.”

“I'm not trying to get you to cry.” 

“Oh my God! yes you are, you're a terrible liar! We're getting a divorce I can't stand you.” 

“I love you too.”

“Whatever,” Gordon mumbled, looking away and pretending not to notice Roger taking his hand with a huge smile. There was a small silence as they soaked in each other's presence, but Gordon couldn't help but think about the operation. 

_Craniotomy _, the weight of the word scared him no matter how many times he tried to play it off. He didn't want to think about what could happen but god, it was _tomorrow _. Everything was happening far too quickly for him and he couldn't control any of it.____

_____ _

_____ _

Against his protesting, tears welled up in Gordon’s eyes, “I don’t want to die.” Roger instantly put a hand to his face to wipe his tears, shushing him and trying to stop Gordon’s shaking. Suddenly all of the anxiety about the operation rushed out of him, leaving Gordon a babbling mess. 

“Sorry Roger but visiting hours are ov- oh, am i interrupting,” RIchard hovered by the doorway, unsure what to do with a crying Gordon. 

“It’s ok, I was just leaving,” Roger said, standing up from his seat and cupping Gordon’s face in his hands. 

‘You don’t want to die Gordo,” Roger asked, wiping the last remnants of tears with his thumb, “then don’t.” 

A last kiss to his forehead, an i love you, and he was gone, forcing Gordon to think about his words. 

The least he could do was write a song. One last song.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Thank you for reading and pls ignore that I fucked up canon akdhkdhdkd. I just got the idea for this fic and started writing and realized after I finished. But also this is my first fic so if y'all have any criticism or notes or something I would love to hear it!!


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